Lost in the Woods

We have a family mountain house in NC. The house is in a very remote area with only trees and a creek surrounding it. It’s literally one of the only things on the mountain.  

In the early 1900’s that was a different story. There was a thriving mica mine above where our property is now.  

One night as our chili was simmering on the stove, my dad said “Hey! Let’s go find the entrance to the mica mine. I’ve seen it before. It’s just right up here to the left. We will be back in 30 minutes.” 

FAMOUS LAST WORDS.  

I grabbed my walking stick and naively followed my dad. The entrance “just on the left” NEVER CAME.  

We passed tree after tree. Not on a trail mind you, because there was no trail anymore. We had ventured off the once trodden path because after almost a hundred years, the path was overgrown.  

At this point we were just traipsing through the woods on the side of a mountain.  

Couldn’t see our house (or the mica mine!) at all.  

After an HOUR, we finally got semi close to the house. The best and quickest way there was straight down a massive hill (because we were on a literal mountain….). 

I tried to step down slowly, but of course ended up sliding on my tail all the way down and we FINALLY made it safely to our house.  

Now, it’s a great story to tell.  

But in the moment? It was scary. Darkness was approaching and we were lost in the woods.  

Without proper equipment, it was impossible to get down the mountain safely and easily. The path was gone, there was no cell service, and there was no one to help us.  

Unfortunately, this is how navigating the childcare system can be for caregivers.  

Many people don’t understand the pressures, the heavy weight of responsibility, or the difficult situations that come up daily in early care and education centers across the state. 

In fact, South Carolina has the highest number of children with one or more out-of-school preschool expulsions in the country.  ? 

At SCIMHA, we are working hard to change the way “bad behaviors” are viewed and dealt with in the early care and educations centers.  

Most “bad behaviors” are just a child trying to express their physical, emotional, or mental needs that aren’t being met. Without the proper tools, they can’t express themselves in a way that adults recognize as a cry for help.  

On the flip side, without a proper understanding of infant and early childhood mental health, adults have a hard time looking at behaviors and analyzing them for what they are and reacting in a way that supports and nurtures the child.  

For both the child and the caregivers, this path can be dark and scary. And we are here to change that. 

Our PEAR Network team is made up of mental health consultants that shine light on that dark path to demystify “bad behaviors” and guide the adults working with young children (ages 0 to 5). They help caregivers discover how to support children as they learn to form secure relationships, manage emotions and explore their environment. 

Check out this story from one of our consultants about a family she has been working with:

"I had the opportunity to provide consultation to a parent of a newly adopted child who is on his eighth or ninth childcare center in just a year due to challenging behaviors. We know from research that black boys are expelled from early care and education centers at a significantly higher rate than other children, and this case has unfortunately been no exception.

While there were barriers engaging with previous childcare centers as prevention efforts to these expulsions, the adoptive mother and I had a beautiful opportunity to reflect on her journey learning new ways to support and advocate for her son. I am also proud to say that we have finally had success connecting to this child’s current childcare center, and as their Infant and Early Childhood Mental Health Consultant, I am able to hold hope for this child and his future as we seek to strengthen the caregiver-child relationships both inside and outside of the classroom."

Just like wandering through the woods on a forgotten path without proper equipment was a silly idea that ended in me sliding down a mountain on my toosh, caregivers and anyone working with children trying to navigate hard situations without proper understanding and support can end in more heartbreak and life-long affects for children.  

If you work with children and find you are often stressed, feel alone, or just aren’t sure how to navigate the cases in front of you, check out our mental health consultation program, PEAR.  

The PEAR Network is largely funded by our partners at the DSS Department of Early Care and Education and we are so thankful for their support!

Our hope at SCIMHA is that we can all unite to change the landscape of infant and early childhood mental health in SC. 

This starts with you. Reach out today! 

-SCIMHA 

PS: If you’re looking for more ways to learn about the issue of preschool expulsion, check out our podcast, Raising Relationships to hear first-hand how expulsion affects families in SC.